


A little death

by tenmillionotters



Category: Tokyo Ghoul
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, F/M, Terminal Illnesses
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-22
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2019-03-22 17:03:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13768593
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tenmillionotters/pseuds/tenmillionotters
Summary: Koori choked on air and coughed, “Don’t say it like that…”“But you mean it like that, don’t you?”Did he…? Well she knew him better than he thought, better than he wanted her to do, it was almost scary. When they first met he didn’t think much of her, he thought she was an airhead, nobody he’d remember once they would separate for good or bad.





	A little death

**Author's Note:**

  * For [linkzeldi](https://archiveofourown.org/users/linkzeldi/gifts).



> I finally want to say thank you to Link for always leaving such amazing and encouraging comments on my work. I’m sorry for not replying I’m just always baffled and don’t know what to say, but it means so so so much to me. Thank you so much. I hope you like this fic.

“... you’re getting thinner…”, she felt his shivering hand run down her spine, was he crying again? She breathed in and out calmly, but she could barely hide the anxiety herself, it wasn’t easy to admit but she was just as scared as he was. 

“I am just not very hungry lately, don’t worry about it Koori,” no matter how often she would reassure them, these words sounded stale. Neither of them believed it. Why would they? The end was near, they knew it. They felt it. 

Their eyes met and Koori felt a piercing pain in his chest, her eyes were so gentle, her gaze was so warm. Did she always look at him like that…? “I am sorry that I made you wait for so long.”

She smiled again, like she always did when she knew that the truth would hurt too much, “But we’re here now, it was worth the wait.” Could she even recall how life felt before this? Hardly, when she was honest. 

“Yeah… we’re here now,” he sighed and pulled her down on the bed into a tight embrace, her body was cold, Koori felt his face burn just thinking about what he was about to say next, “I think I know something that’ll warm both of us up.” 

Ihei laughed and kissed his cheek, “You mean you want to fuck me?”

Koori choked on air and coughed, “Don’t say it like that…”

“But you mean it like that, don’t you?”

Did he…? Well she knew him better than he thought, better than he wanted her to do, it was almost scary. When they first met he didn’t think much of her, he thought she was an airhead, nobody he’d remember once they would separate for good or bad. 

… yet here they were now, holding each other in a tight and desperate embrace, death was knocking on their door, reminding them that he would soon come to take back the child he once gave life to, every day he knocked a little louder. 

“I guess I do…” 

“No need to gloss things over when you’re talking to a dying woman.” 

“Please don’t say that all the time,” Koori just couldn’t and wouldn’t make peace with this thought, “I lo-” 

“Don’t say it… I don’t want to hear it,” she laughed again before cupping his cheeks, kissing him, leaving a faint taste of stale blood in his mouth, “Please save these words for someone who’s worth it, just… let me feel it.” 

“... okay,” there was no chance he would ever let her know how much it hurt when she told him not to say it, as if she knew how much resentment he felt for her before, but his feelings changed, couldn’t she tell? 

“Koori… don’t get attached please.” 

“What if it’s too late already…?” 

“Then just do it,” her laugh mixed with a cough, tears streamed down her face, “Please… make the pain stop…” 

How could he say no to a plea like that? In moments like this he felt so dirty, feeling his erection pressing against his jeans when he was looking at such a vulnerable woman, but she was so beautiful, so frail. If he would tell her that she looked like an angel she would tell that it was because she would become one soon, no no no no, he didn’t want to think about it now. 

“Be a little more patient…” 

“Sorry…”, even the slightest touch hurt her sore muscles, he needed to be gentle when he took her clothes off. When Koori placed her thin legs on his shoulders he felt how cold they were now, it was only getting worse, “Relax a bit.” 

“Mhm…”, Ihei breathed out deeply and closed her eyes, she felt his breath brushing over skin, giving her goosebumps, “K-Koori -” Usually he started off with a kiss on her stomach, but today she felt his tongue pressing against her clit but he moved his tongue down to her entrance, teasing it before he pushed his tongue inside. 

Her legs were shaking slightly while she moaned in pleasure, it wasn’t that he was more impatient than usual, it was a much darker motivation. If he gave his best, she would faint, she would sleep, forget about the pain for a few hours. 

“W-What are you doing?”, she could barely raise her head but caught a glimpse at his hands that now spread her lips, while his index finger rubbed over her clit in circular motion, "Don't stop..." 

He loved it, every moan, every plea, every sharp breath she drew, every time she exhaled, every time her voice broke, the shivering legs that slowly closed around around his neck. All he wanted was to know that she felt good, that she could let go of whatever was bothering her right now, he just wanted her to vanish in all of his love. 

“Go s-slower I don’t want to come y-yet -” 

Koori slowly pulled back and inhaled, then he kissed her stomach and looked at her, “Don’t worry about that.” His eyes were covered by his hair again as he leaned down, he kissed her before he placed his head between her legs again.

This time he was gentler, went slower, but it didn’t have the effect she expected it to have. Ihei’s voice broke as she dug her fingers deep into Koori’s hair. There was nothing left to do but to lay back and enjoy it. 

He felt the soft rocking of her hips against his lips and tongue, he felt his head spin from his own desires that nearly made him forget that he was doing this for her. Yes, all he did, he did for her sake. 

“K-Koori -”, she felt a wave of pain spread from her lap through the rest of her body, drowning out everything she felt before, leaving her in a state of blissful numbness. 

Koori slowly backed away and gazed at Ihei who was still basking in the afterglow of her orgasm. Maybe he was selfish, maybe he was selfless. 

Before his hands to reach for the nightstand she grabbed his wrist and pulled it back, “We don’t need to use them…” 

Maybe he just wanted to pretend that everything was okay. 

It seemed her like body was still desirable to him even though she could barely see herself was a person anymore, it felt so good to hold him while he slowly entered her body. 

He knew that she didn’t want him to be careful, but he still was. At least for now. He kissed her cheek, her nose, her forehead. No matter what she thought of herself, to him she was the most beautiful person he had ever seen, with her light eyes and her dyed hair. 

“I know, Koori.” 

Of course she did. She knew even before he did it himself, but she never let him say it, as if she knew that their time was limited. 

Feeling him start to move finally gave her the relief she was waiting for for so long. He was a gentle and clumsy lover, but just right for her. Knowing she was the one that would always haunt him when he thought of his first experiences was oddly satisfying. It meant he would never forget her, for better or worse. 

Her voice was so sweet, it was all he heard, it slowly filled his mind until there was nothing left but her. His fingers dug into her hips as he moved in a steady rhythm, her breathing pattern adjusting to his movements. She was so gorgeous while she lost herself in his love, her cold body slowly grew hotter, her weak heart began to beat faster. 

Koori’s fingers ran over her pale cheeks, gently caressing her while he moved inside her without a care in the world, she liked it like this, she begged him to go harder. The more intense her pleasure got, the less she felt the pain and dread of being alive. 

His mind was blank, the only sounds he made were moans and grunts, he felt her body shiver while she fought with herself to not lose conscience. It was just what they wanted but it was coming too fast, but by God, he just couldn’t stop, feeling her move and tighten around his cock. 

“I-hei -”, he breathed her name out hard while she let out a husky scream, feeling him flooding her body. She slowly raised her hand as if she was trying to grab his but instead she passed out. 

Koori felt his teeth dig into his bottom lip as he held back tears while cleaning up her pale skin, he carefully dressed her and covered her with her blanket. She smiled happily in her sleep, not feeling any pain for a few hours was more than just blissful to her. 

Once he got himself cleaned and dressed he lied down next to her, he pulled her frail body closer and hugged her tightly, “I love you…” She couldn’t be mad at him for saying it when she slept, maybe she would scold him when she woke up… if she would wake up at all.


End file.
